Something For Everyone, or How I Learned To Accept the SMOOSH.

I was just laying awake (with a throat-lump, a belated gift courtesy of Chris) thinking about how everything - even the Most Boring Of Subjects - is interesting to someone out there.

Last night I went to a lecture for Toronto's Festival of Architecture and Design called Circle in the Square architecture. I mistakenly thought that it would contextualize this form, or use the form as a way of better understanding Byzantine architecture. But it was just a guy showing examples of churches constructed as circles in squares. Nothing more. For some reason, he's really into them. He couldn't talk about them philosophically, or compare them to other forms. Needless to say, it was Very Boring.



But, sitting in front of me, was the official Weirdest Lady of the Week.

She seemed to be having secret conversations with the painted saints (in the church where the lecture was held). Some of them were obviously telling her jokes, as she'd listen to what they had to say, make a few whimsical hand gestures, and then double over in joyous laughter. Others received admonition from her - she actually wagged her finger at them. This went on for the entire lecture. It was awesome. Near the end of the lecture, she put on her earphones and started to dance.

Sartorially, the had chosen to wear a Scrunchie Made Out Of Synthetic Hair (or SMOOSH), which has, and will to continue, to offend me greatly:


(This is a particularly vulgar example).

But, I tell you, never did a SMOOSH seem so right. Something for everyone.

When I'm 100.

I hope to look as chic as this. I don't believe that at the ripe old age of 30 I can yet wear a convincing neck-scarf. 

Photo by moi.

What I Didn't Get.

I promised Trish and Lisa that I'd take some dressing room shots, which I did. Of the stuff that I didn't get. And you can probably see why.

Here's what I'll look like when I'm pregnant. Pretty!

This was okay, but I've always been convinced I look jaundiced in yellow:

Cartoon Sailor.

Very wide jacket. I could hide so much stuff in there:


Marimekko top:

Dress that was so so short in the back. I don't know what designers have against covering el bum. I even like to be able to lift my arms and still have my bum covered.

Meh x 1000.

Prado: New & Improved.

It must be a real shit of a challenge to design a museum. I was thrilled to see that Martin Filler* will be writing a series of critiques on recent museum designs/redesigns for Architectural Record. You can read the first one here.

I enjoyed these images of the newly designed Prado extension in Madrid. It looks simple and light while still creating a sense of awe. I think it heightens the work, as opposed to overwhelming it.

I have a special place in my heart for the Prado, as it's the only place that I've ever met a genuine sea captain. For real!

And it also has a magnificent collection. It was the first time I'd seen Hieronymus Bosch in person. The Goyas were overwhelming and shocking and I nearly barfed with excitement.

*I also highly recommend Filler's recent book, The Makers of Modern Architecture. Informative! Comprehensive! Elegantly written!

Dumbo and Pretzels.

This picture was taken just before I delved into a Cheese Pretzel Bun at Almondine Bakery, so I didn't even know what was coming. It's basically the best pretzel ever, but bun-shaped, with a kind of buttery yum in the middle and cheese on top. Uh-huh.

And then Chris and I shared some sort of nut thing for 'dessert'. Just so I could give my diabetes a work out. It's so effing lazy.

Sweater: Ben Sherman, Top: Anthropologie, Jeans: Theory

The Monkey's Paw.

One of my most favourite books of all time is Lawrence Weschler's Mr. Wilson's Cabinet of Wonders (I actually adore all of his writing). So I am naturally in adoration of a tiny shop on Dundas West called The Monkey's Paw. By its own description, the store is "Toronto's most idiosyncratic secondhand bookshop, specializing in uncommon scholarly and out-of-print books; ephemera and images; manual typewriters; biological specimens."

And now they've got a blog, showcasing their newest wares with very funny commentary. Here are some of my favourite 'new' books:

From the top: Guidance and Control of Spacecraft (1966), Attempt at a Theory of Synthesist Plastic Expression (1963) and YOU MUST RELAX by Edmund Jacobson (1942). I am being totally sincere when I say that I think I need the last one. And maybe the first one.

Ugly Pants: A Comparative Case Study

I don't mean to be negative on this thing, but I have come across a pair of pants that are so confounding in their ugliness that I have to share them. It also brings me to an ongoing bit of confusion, which is why one is drawn to the ugliest of things because it seems cool, when it makes one look horrific. Oh fashion, I have so many questions for you.

Anyway, I came across Artifact #1 while walking in Tribeca, minding my own business:

Let me do the run-down, in case your eyes were seared by the badness of it all: they are nude, they are onesies (or so it seems - they cover her feet. I now repent all of the times that I've wished for adult onesies), and they have a giant piece of drapey fabric, presumably beginning at the crotchal region, just hanging around. I guess just in case.

After seeing this, I put out a challenge to my friends to find worser pants. Only my friend Mike, brave as he is, submitted a photo:

Okay, yes, this is very bad. I think we can all agree on this. But here's the thing - Nude Crotch Pant was trying to be fashionable. She was young, she was cute. America Pant, I believe, lives outside of the world of fashion, and is maybe just overzealous in her Need To Show The World How Much She Loves Her Country.

So the challenge still stands.

I'm goin' in.

I'm not being hyperbolic when I say that I get heart palpitations going into Anthropologie. And it's not just the clothing, it's the sheer creativity:



The above is a kitchen scene, complete with working 'waterfall' - a pitcher tipped over into a sink full of dishes. Below, a display for cabinet pulls:


And a lighting fixture made of books. I like books!


A darn cute pitcher:


A bed hung from the ceiling, adorned with beautiful paper vines:


Wonderful luggage table things. One could likely make these for substantially less that the $350 - 500 price tags.


For Trish and Lisa: Dressing room shots coming soon.

Some things we got.

So I bought a ton of shit in New York. But like really, really nice stuff. And Chris got some great stuff too, including this tie, which I feel is in the running for the Best Tie Ever:


Yes, those are tiny vespas. And yes, people stopped him on the street to tell him how much they liked his tie.
I got a lovely red dress and posed here in front of a wall in the West Village:



More goodness to come...

Tie: Ben Sherman, Dress: Anthropologie, Scarf: Esprit, Jacket: Philip Adec

For mum.

My mother used to design store windows, and I remember her going on vacation and coming back with rolls of film full of shop windows, which didn't always seem too exciting. But now I understand it more, especially when I have the chance to visit Anthropologie. And holy eff, did they ever have awesome displays when I was there last weekend. So these are for you, mum!



One of the best things about this one is that they replace the full apple with the eaten apple once the day is done.




A beehive made of newspaper! And the bees are bs!






A t made of teacups. And the cutest ever sugar holder:


Creativity like this makes shopping really exciting. It's kind of like my version of an amusement park. And I'm not even joking. I'll post interior shots and dressing room shots (gasp!) later.

Scouting.

Chris and I went scouting for a project that we're doing. We came across this little pioneer village, which wasn't yet open for the season, so we played around a bit.

An old caboose! A real one! And me.

Top: Joe Fresh, Skirt: Gap, Sandals: Winners